Racism in men is indeed pretty odd in my experience.
A black girl can be hot, and you can have sex with one, but if you date one, you're a N-lover. One of my co-workers used to be super racist and his son had to hide that he was dating a black girl for several years. Then he knocked her up so they had to come clean. There was a lot of problems at first (from both mom and dad) but that has gone mostly away. Racist things are still said, but just not about his daughter-in-law typically. And the grandkids are definitely spoiled and well loved.
Its weird how someone can change so much in such a short period of time.