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Saz Abroad - EP 1: The United Arab Emirates • The Lounge • Political Crossfire Forums

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Saz Abroad - EP 1: The United Arab Emirates

Postby Saz » Sun Mar 08, 2015 3:59 pm

After much deliberation I realized that my criticism isn't always constructive, and I have therefore chosen to enlighten you proles by providing you with the best travel reviews and advice based on my previous trips. Today we begin with the United Arab Emirates (UAE).

I began my 7-day trip by flying into Abu Dhabi airport. This is an Etihad hub and thanks to a lucrative sponsorship agreement with OIL, flights are heavily subsidized and you can often find very cheap tickets through the year, particularly on business or first class tickets. Etihad was an average airline to be honest, worse than some of the better carrier in Europe and Asia, better than every American carrier though. Flight was half empty on the way there, but I'm about to board a fully booked 14+ hour flight back so I will probably hate this airline the next time you hear from me.

Abu Dhabi was a very cool city, around 1.5 million people. The first thing you notice about the UAE is that prices are weird. And by that I mean food and other "goods" are about western prices, services and labor though are very cheap. So taxis, attendants, hotel service etc. is all excellent and basically free, but for meals and stuff you pay western prices. Alcohol is severely marked up and basically only sold at western hotels and beaches. First day in Abu Dhabi we went out to a nearby hotel bar and ended up meeting some cool French people who gave us the lay of the land. We (no joke) got really drunk and started singing the Marseilles and Star Spangled Banner, which really excited and really terrified the Nepalese bartender. Day 2 we chilled at the private beach at the hotel. Awesome beach but the water is very salty. Day 3 we took one of those hop on hop off tours. Went to the observation deck at the new Etihad towers, which was cool. Stopped at Ferrari world (hilariously unnecessary and overdone but f**k it why not), and about 3 different malls. But the highlight by far was the Sheik Zayed Mosque (Pic Below). Pictures can't do it justice, this is an NFL stadium sized mosque made out of solid white marble and gold. The Chandelier in the main prayer hall is the size of a semi-truck and it must have taken a billion Iranian man-hours to weave the Persian rugs. Fun Fact: This is one of the few mosques in the middle east that non-Muslims can visit, and seeing as this is the third biggest most in the world (after 2 in Saudi), its probably the biggest and best any non-Muslim will be able to see. After the mosque we got a buss to Dubai, which took about 2 hours.

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Dubai is the big Kahuna. First night we got there we went to an awesome club in the Burj Al-Arab (Pic Below). It was a sick club, tons of hot chicks, drinks were outrageously expensive but there were a ton of cool Emirati bros there (in traditional garb and all) just balling out and buying everyone anything they wanted. This went on for like half an hour in our section of the bar. Not clear on the details of how everyone got back to the hotel but let's just say I never would have expected you could party like that in the ME.

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Day 4 rolls around and I'm basically hungover all day. Awesome breakfast though with an army of servants attending to you (I can put syrup on my own waffle happy little Indian man). In the afternoon I got back on the hop on tours and saw the Burj Khalifa (pic below). Words cannot describe how big and impressive this building is. It's literally built in a flat desert so there is nothing obstructing your view of it from most parts of the city. It's just huge and insanely tall. There are a few hotels nearby that rival the empire state building for height and they all look like shitty condos next to this beast. This was the most impressive thing in Dubai for me and honestly it's a stunning human achievement (same architect firm built Burj, New WTC, Sears tower...NAB needs to up his game).

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Last day we chilled on the beaches and went to the Dubai mall. Again, this mall is just hilariously large. Think of any single store and it's there. There was an ice-skating ring, a food court that could feel an army, so many million-dollar cars in the valet no one even bothered to take pictures. The mall is in the base of the Burj Khalifa and at night they do this amazing fountain show. In the evening we went on a desert safari. Load up in some hummers and just drive around the sand dunes (see below). This was pretty awesome but dangerous also, one land cruiser rolled and another got stuck in the sand. Rode some camels, rode ATV's on the dunes, and had a great dinner in a traditional (not really but a mock up) Bedouin camp.

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Conclusion: This country was way more impressive than I expected. Very chill with regard to the whole religion thing really and it was basically not an issue at all for us. The city is basically laid out in an American model, with 12 lane highways and a ton of SUV's. The weather was absolutely perfect the entire time we were there until today when a small sandstorm rolled in. Everyone speaks English pretty much and you will hear more Filipino or Hindi than Arabic really. Best part, absolutely no f**k taxes on anything. Literally no income or sales tax and cars were selling for 30% less and more than they would in the US. I was apprehensive about a trip that could mean no drinking or girls in bikinis, but actually, the UAE is a perfectly developed country and I found it completely livable. Biggest restriction is an Internet firewall, but it’s not even a fraction of as invasive as the Chinese one. The scary part is they are still building half the country and have grand plan after grand plan, who knows where it will be in 10-20 years.

This is entry-level Middle East and I encourage all you proles to broaden your horizons and visit. **==
DON'T BE A TOUGH GUY. DON'T BE A FOOL! I WILL CALL YOU LATER.
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Re: Saz Abroad - EP 1: The United Arab Emirates

Postby The Comrade » Sun Mar 08, 2015 5:35 pm

i'd rather bomb them
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Re: Saz Abroad - EP 1: The United Arab Emirates

Postby Decypher » Sun Mar 08, 2015 7:09 pm

Good post. A friend of mine used to live in Dubai but I never got around to visiting him. Now he lives in Riyadh which isn't particularly appealing as a holiday destination.
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Re: Saz Abroad - EP 1: The United Arab Emirates

Postby eynon81 » Sun Mar 08, 2015 7:17 pm

see any slaves yet?

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Re: Saz Abroad - EP 1: The United Arab Emirates

Postby Saz » Sun Mar 08, 2015 9:59 pm

I don't think so. You can never be sure I guess but we shot the shit with some of the workers on a construction site by our hotel and they seemed in good spirits. Even working construction in the desert is probably a step up from the conditions most of the south asian workers probably came from.

Half the city is under construction.

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Re: Saz Abroad - EP 1: The United Arab Emirates

Postby broken robot » Mon Mar 09, 2015 6:13 am

The Subversives
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Re: Saz Abroad - EP 1: The United Arab Emirates

Postby Aaron » Mon Mar 09, 2015 9:13 pm

What a soulless place to blow your cash in
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Re: Saz Abroad - EP 1: The United Arab Emirates

Postby Saz » Tue Mar 10, 2015 7:17 am

DON'T BE A TOUGH GUY. DON'T BE A FOOL! I WILL CALL YOU LATER.
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Re: Saz Abroad - EP 1: The United Arab Emirates

Postby Saz » Tue Mar 10, 2015 7:27 am

DON'T BE A TOUGH GUY. DON'T BE A FOOL! I WILL CALL YOU LATER.
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Re: Saz Abroad - EP 1: The United Arab Emirates

Postby eric » Tue Mar 10, 2015 7:55 am

"With the first link, the chain is forged. The first speech censured, the first thought forbidden, the first freedom denied, chains us all irrevocably."
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