Thought this was funny

[uebermann]

I was asked to look at our company cell phone bill to see why we had overage charges which then turned into going back over the last 4 months and doing a breakdown of everyone's minutes, texts, and internet usage for each month.

I knew our VP didn't do shit and spent a lot of time texting but here's his texting stats

Over the last 3 months, he averaged 4,600 texts per month. A study done in March 2012 found that teenage girls average 100 texts per day. So 3000 per month. So he's texting 1600 more times in a month than your average teenage girl. Just by breaking down the numbers he texts the most and knowing our cell phone numbers, I was able to find that 96% of his texts were not work related. And its probably closer to 98% but I didn't want to go through all the phone numbers as there were many, many numbers in there.

I am tempted to go back during his daughter's soccer season to see how many texts he was doing then, because I wouldn't be surprised in the least if the numbers were 6000+ because he did nothing but text and make non-work related phone calls all day long for nearly 4 months straight. I may also go back and determine how much time was spent during the business day texting and calling non-work related numbers.

(btw he was the person in charge of the phone bill until I was asked to go back and look at some things)

[OGPhilly]

You're the part owner, right? Can you get rid of this dipshit?

[uebermann]

[uebermann]

BTW, I used the least amount of data over 12 months (and had the least used every month but one), had the fewest texts, and the fewest minutes used.

Skype ftw.

[Mo~]

Ya, see this is why the most important rule in Management Accounting is that the people with their hands on the money and bills are REQUIRED to go on vacation every so often while the auditors zoom in and check over their shit. You'd be amazed how often that diligent, hard working guy who never takes a break or time off is doing that just because he has to maintain constant watch and maintenance of the accounts to keep his ass covered.

[John Galt]

he married? no man would text their wife that amount, but certainly would text other female(s). the wife couldn't see the texts on the bill neither

[uebermann]

[The Comrade]

he's banging someone else then

[Precocity]

4,600 texts a month? Sounds like he's banging more than one woman.

Well, maybe his idea of banging is sexting.

[Professor]

This reminds me of the hyperion teacher thread.

You can be right, and still lose. If you want to be right, then be sure to dig deeply and highlight the fact that the VP was texting a lot. Show some initiative and reverse lookup the phone numbers, then list names next to each on your report. In the end, you may uncover some wrongdoing. The VP may get slapped, or even repremanded. Doubtful he'd get fired. But, you'd have a very big enemy. And, even those whom you didn't incriminate might view you as a snitch of sorts. And, god forbid that the VP is actually NOT doing anything bad (talking to clients, perhaps)?

Or, you can just do the job, present the numbers in a very fair and honest way, without pointing any fingers. LIst telephone numbers next to number of texts, with a legend of names and numbers in the back. Yeah, you'll be giving them the same info, but it won't appear that you are the one pointing any fingers.